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I arrived in Calgary, AB, yesterday evening after driving for far too long. In total, I covered 4,580 km.
The final stretch of driving originated from Bozeman, MT. The day before, I departed Wall, SD, and rolled into Bozeman. The day before THAT day (confused yet?), I set out from southeastern Minnesota and arrived at Wall, SD.
What I want to point out here is I had three consecutive days of 8-10 hours of solo driving. I like to drive, and I handle long hauls well, but I was starting to get worn down by day three. Despite this, when I reached Calgary's city limits, I couldn't help but smile. It wasn't a dramatic "OH THANK GOD" sense of relief; I felt excited and energized. Indeed, I had a stupid grin on my face for the remaining 15-20 minutes of that drive, as I traversed the city and arrived at my new home.
After some reflection, I'm content that this was my reflex. I know exactly why - I have positive memories of Calgary. Prior to my arrival, I've visited the city five times in five years. I visited friends and explored and experienced a diversity of things with them. I became familiar with its layout, learning the areas and how to navigate. In many ways, Calgary isn't that unfamiliar to me. It only dawned on me yesterday how much of a massive deal that is with respect to settling and moving forward. I'm awful with goodbyes, and my last week in Montréal and the depth of "holy fuck, I'm really leaving" started to set in (I will address this in detail in my next entry) and I was fraught with futile second thoughts. It's important not to dwell, but at the same time, not to forget. Viewing your new home with positivity and in my case, having a pre-exisiting emotional connection, I believe will greatly help the transition.
Of course, this knowledge was instrumental to my decision to relocate here, the plans for which started nearly two years ago. I suppose it's not surprising that I'd chose a location knowing that I'd end up somewhere that could make me happy. After spending so many years depressed, I got really fucking tired of it, and prioritized ending up somewhere where I could do and be what I love over all else.
(Quick tangent: I was taken aback by how many friends said how I looked so much more merry and lively after I wrapped up my Ph.D. Evidently, previously I had an omnipresent, underlying layer of melancholy and exhaustion to my demeanor. I had no idea. Anyway, I digress.)
My landlord is an absolute sweetheart of a lady in her late 50's. She offered to help bring in some of my stuff, and insisted on driving me to the grocery and liquor stores. I was reluctant, arguing that I didn't want to impose (she woke up at 4h30 that morning to go to work), but she was insistent. We get along and have similar senses of humor. Afterwards, when I came up to my room, she had left a little stuffed teddy bear on my bed. Being internally 7 years old, I exclaimed with excitement upon the sight, "OH AND I HAVE A FRIEND!". Landlady cackled, and replied, "I always put a little friend for my new tenants, because I know you're so far from home and it can help."
I relayed this anecdote to one of my best homies, to which she replied: "It warms my heart to know you're in good hands."
So, there's that. I am grateful.
Today, I'm going to finish organizing myself and settling in. I will cycle, I will play computer games. I will start my new job tomorrow. And I will go from there.
The final stretch of driving originated from Bozeman, MT. The day before, I departed Wall, SD, and rolled into Bozeman. The day before THAT day (confused yet?), I set out from southeastern Minnesota and arrived at Wall, SD.
What I want to point out here is I had three consecutive days of 8-10 hours of solo driving. I like to drive, and I handle long hauls well, but I was starting to get worn down by day three. Despite this, when I reached Calgary's city limits, I couldn't help but smile. It wasn't a dramatic "OH THANK GOD" sense of relief; I felt excited and energized. Indeed, I had a stupid grin on my face for the remaining 15-20 minutes of that drive, as I traversed the city and arrived at my new home.
After some reflection, I'm content that this was my reflex. I know exactly why - I have positive memories of Calgary. Prior to my arrival, I've visited the city five times in five years. I visited friends and explored and experienced a diversity of things with them. I became familiar with its layout, learning the areas and how to navigate. In many ways, Calgary isn't that unfamiliar to me. It only dawned on me yesterday how much of a massive deal that is with respect to settling and moving forward. I'm awful with goodbyes, and my last week in Montréal and the depth of "holy fuck, I'm really leaving" started to set in (I will address this in detail in my next entry) and I was fraught with futile second thoughts. It's important not to dwell, but at the same time, not to forget. Viewing your new home with positivity and in my case, having a pre-exisiting emotional connection, I believe will greatly help the transition.
Of course, this knowledge was instrumental to my decision to relocate here, the plans for which started nearly two years ago. I suppose it's not surprising that I'd chose a location knowing that I'd end up somewhere that could make me happy. After spending so many years depressed, I got really fucking tired of it, and prioritized ending up somewhere where I could do and be what I love over all else.
(Quick tangent: I was taken aback by how many friends said how I looked so much more merry and lively after I wrapped up my Ph.D. Evidently, previously I had an omnipresent, underlying layer of melancholy and exhaustion to my demeanor. I had no idea. Anyway, I digress.)
My landlord is an absolute sweetheart of a lady in her late 50's. She offered to help bring in some of my stuff, and insisted on driving me to the grocery and liquor stores. I was reluctant, arguing that I didn't want to impose (she woke up at 4h30 that morning to go to work), but she was insistent. We get along and have similar senses of humor. Afterwards, when I came up to my room, she had left a little stuffed teddy bear on my bed. Being internally 7 years old, I exclaimed with excitement upon the sight, "OH AND I HAVE A FRIEND!". Landlady cackled, and replied, "I always put a little friend for my new tenants, because I know you're so far from home and it can help."
I relayed this anecdote to one of my best homies, to which she replied: "It warms my heart to know you're in good hands."
So, there's that. I am grateful.
Today, I'm going to finish organizing myself and settling in. I will cycle, I will play computer games. I will start my new job tomorrow. And I will go from there.
